In a car I was driving, again I found the right side of the road was just as bumpy as the left side. I stopped on the curb of nearby corner grocer to purchased something to drink. Sitting once more in the car's front seat, I sat holding a plastic bottle of soda. I pulled it to my mouth. I wondering agaion when would be a good time to call Daniel...just what to say. Lately I had little mercy about his new life style, and I was showing it too. He hated my calling inferring I was making an complete ass of myself.
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I sat very still in the bucket seat recalling Daniel childhood raising with great joy. Looking out the dash window I smiled realizing how good he did. Now newly married, Daniel and Denise were making inroads to setting up their new way of life. "By not bothering them they'd learn I had faith in them," Daniel had told me repeatedly; but now, again, I was driving by his new home. I just felt uncomfortable about his choice of his new living arrangements, and I started lording over them. I drove the 30 miles planning to make up some meaningful excuse about my being out in the Corinth area and by myself.
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Finishing up the bottled soda, I pulled the car away from the curb. "Hey there, did you see I was about to pull out of this place!" I yelled out at the man pulling into the slot near the curb I was now leaving. "You dough, dough. How about a little consideration before someone hits you in the rear end." I yelled out again. Some people don't pay much attention to what they're doing, I said out load at the window.
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Turning again onto Corinth Ave, I took over the right lane hoping to turn into a mall's parking lot...I needed to stop and make that call to Daniel. I just couldn't stop myself from the constant worry about this area of town. I dazed off at needing things to go in a better direction...in my terms 'the correct way'. I had set my plan in motion, and I was now at the mall on Corinth calling into the web for help. Turning off the ignition I started dialing the phone. After a near run in with the law I felt better about sitting back to call and I waited for the web to load.
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"No, no answer yet." I said out load. "He mustn't have had time to write yet...with the new furniture, and Denise's things getting there." I said looking around. I sat wondering what to do next. This neighborhood was a disaster...what was the appeal...God, it's in shambles! I'd faith in his ability to reason-- but, this flat crap out here!
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By impulse, I reach to the ignition and turned the key to start the engine...an old lady by herself, I'd have my wallet jumped. Bing. I quickly looked at the cellphone yanking my head around dragging my hat off. It was Denise! The guilt rushed over me. I couldn't move. She'd left a message. Quickly starting the car, I pulled back out of the parking place and hurried down the parking aisle and left the mall's lot.
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Fifteen minutes later my memory came back. I have made an almost promise not to hover over their moving deeper into the Corinth area. Thank God I didn't answered the phone. My voice alone would've tip her off. My lack of faith in theor ability to judge this out cause me to act like a mother hen plucking at the ground waiting for her chick to come out and get some sunshine. I started to cry...what was I doing! Out on the freeway I heard the phone ring again. I held my breathe and pressed down on the accelerator. I had earlier left my urgent message knowing Daniel call back right away, but this time he didn't return my call right away. Both of us, me and his dad, taught pride in independence, now it was me who was falling down, and on this dumpy side of town.
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Looking at the phone, I knew I needed to answer it. Pulling onto the nearest exit, I went into a filling station. The car slid passed other parked cars, and it sat idling near the end of the row. Yes, the message was from them. It read, "Call now please". Dialing Daniel's number I waited for an answer. "Hello, Mom." I heard Denise say. In the best positive tone I could muster I answered the voice back, "Yes, it's me. How's things going. I wanted to call and ask about lunch, but it got late...I know your busy moving in and all...one more pair of feet wouldn't help much. I have perfect faith in you to get that job done on your own." Finishing, I added in a nervous reply, "Moreover I call God for a record upon my soul, that to spare you I came not as yet unto Corinth. 24 Not for that we have dominion over your faith, but are helpers of your joy: for by faith ye stand." (2 Corinthians 1: 23-24). Taken back, I sat surprised...I couldn'd believe what I had just run down to her. The return call ended as quickly as it had started as I plopped the lid down over the cell pad.
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I drove quickly home. Getting out of the car, I pitched the empty plastic bottle into the trash can at the corner of the house. I stood smiling about what I'd reeled off to them. Thankfully I hadn't pushed my way into their life again...I was finally tired of the arguments I was bringing on y self. My feelings were hurt. I'll get past this. Trust in God with this. There's got to be worst places in town to live in. Stepping up the rear stairs, I went on into house. Click. The latch fell into the door jamb as I closed the door behind me.
